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April 15 2017

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Return from the Stars, by Stanislaw Lem, published 1961.

this is wild

April 14 2017

Digital Intimacy



  • knowing when your friend is out of the house, because their phone capitalises their messages
  • noticing they’re down because that was the wrong emoticon
  • lol vs lmao vs hahaha vs ahaha
  • subtly wrapping your schedule around the edges of timezones on the other side of the world
  • conversations that play out over a week because you’re both perpetually idle but you want to know how they’re doing
  • not being able to wake up for an alarm, but leaping halfway across the house for the message alert you’ve been waiting for
  • talking to the same person about different topics in three conversations simultaneously
  • knowing when your friends have been spending time together because they start to type alike 
  • watching them start and stop typing over and over and not interrupting, because this must be important
  • Sending them links to pictures or posts or articles you know they’ll enjoy, whether or not they’re around.
  • Knowing exactly how they always say hello and goodbye, and what it means when they change it up.
  • Leaving an addendum to a conversation after they’ve gone to bed because you thought of something else that was too important to wait until they come back.
  • Having a rough idea of their schedule because you know when they log in.
  • Keeping connected throughout the day with phone games (like Words With Friends), even when neither of you can talk.
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i don’t think anyone outside of Germany understands how scarring it is to hear the words “Fresh Dumbledore”. you do not know that there’s a whole generation of Germans out there who get thrown back in time upon hearing those words… war flashbacks of “wer zum Teufel ist Amanda”, “Voldemort hat einen Stein nach mir geworfen”, “SCHINKEN!” and “Ich bin alt, ich bin bald tot, aus grün mach rot. Klatsch!”… those and so many other quotes still haunt me.

you do not know that there’s a whole parallel universe in Germany where Hermione is a lesbian, Dumbledore is a gangster rapper, Gilderoy Lockhard is a porn star and everything is 100% obscene. that everyone quoted these dubs for months. that there were actual albums of Fresh Dumbledore out there that you could listen to. That there was also an album of Snape’s black metal band. Even Warner Brothers got wind of it and threatened to sue.

one woman in Germany redefined Harry Potter for countless people for years, and none of you even know.

the memory of it is burnt into my brain and I cannot escape. 

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He thinks he’s being sneaky

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American Gods
The Old Gods [Pt. 1]

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April 13 2017

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PROFESSOR FARNSWORTH: To prevent the soufflé from exploding, Bender will carry it. He’s gyroscopically stable!

Okay can we take the time to appreciate how much of a bitch this must’ve been to animate and how much effort the animators put into it?

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